Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Headline Hues for Heartfelt Blues

A few weeks ago tragedy (to me) struck. Slipping on stairs slick and shiny from melted snow, my dear camera bashed on the concrete stairs and part of the lens broke. As I was able to discover on further examination, it was only the lens filter, but a possibly costly repair nonetheless. In addition to this problem, the camera itself is old. It's a bit like a marathon runner past his prime - still fit and strong and good, but just not what it used to be. The buttons are a bit bi-polar, how they decide whether or when to work or not remains a mystery to me, I'm just thankful it still focuses (most of the time, albeit it's getting slower) and the shutter works so photographs can be taken. Basically, it functions and I can make do with it, but as my dear photography teacher has been telling me for months, I need a new one. 

After the lens broke my initial response was a mild freak-out that lasted for about 5 minutes and I'm not exactly totally proud of. But it was a bad day, and everyone is allowed a few tears, right? Mostly I was, and maybe still am, unhappy that I allowed a thing to matter so much. God was great, though, and He allowed me to give up my care and concern about a materialistic item and trust. I felt such a great sense of peace that didn't seem logical by worldly standards. Yes, my best lens was possibly broken beyond repair (I didn't know the extent of the damage yet) and I might not be able to take photos for awhile, but it was going to be okay, and I knew that deep inside. With Jesus, everything was, and is, okay. 

So I chose to trust that He would provide for my needs one way or another. I didn't know if this would come through the avenue of a new camera, a loan, money, or simply not being able to take photos for awhile. Whatever happened, I was simply not worried or concerned about it. 
Then, a few days ago, my mom told me my grandparents were giving me $400 for school. Though they had initially expected me to use it towards paying of my steadily growing student-loan debt, they were fine with me using it towards or for a new camera. 

Woah. God provided. I'm not buying a new one yet, I want to save up about $200 more so I can really get a good one, but a new camera is now months rather than years away. It is so good to see God provide. It is so incredible to see prayers answered. I had no idea how God would provide, but I was absolutely certain that He would, and He did. 

I'm not saying every time we pray for something and then trust God will give it to us He will. That's not how it works. What I'm saying is trust, trust and obey, for there's no other way. God delights in giving us good things. He is sad when we are sad. But He also knows best, and sometimes what we want is not best for us. The key is to trust in Him, utterly certain in the knowledge that He will always provide for our needs. He cares for us more than we could possibly imagine. That's the truth, that's the real story. Not a sad tale of a broken camera lens and the joy of money to put towards repair and a new camera. That's the fifth-page short story stuck in the paper as a filler. It's no headline news. The headlining story is love, great and unconditional love that covers us like a soft blanket of snow and wraps us in warm, comforting arms. The headline is God, Love, Grace, and Care greater than we could ever imagine. And the subhead is trust, trust in the greatest Father, Friend, and King we could ever have.

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