Friday, May 11, 2012

Day 22 - I'm the most humble.

Jesus exposes spiritual pride - Luke 20:20-47

Sometimes it's so hard to separate this world from God's world. All we know is earth, everything we know is in earthly terms, our perspectives are formed by what we know of this world, and God doesn't fit in that perception. God is not of this world, He cannot be defined by our understandings. That can make living for Him hard, it's a whole different way of thinking, a whole different mode of being, than what we or this world are characterized by. Often times, it doesn't make sense to people, who we are or why we've chosen the paths we're on. It can be complicated, difficult, even awkward at times (like explaining why you aren't concerned with future plans because "God will tell me what to do and when to do it," yeah, insurance agencies don't quite understand that one). We aren't to worry about how people view us, or what they think of us, our treasure is stored up in Heaven, where we will be like the angels, the children of God.

And as an extension of this, we are called to be humble, for God is the author of all things, and we are His children, the sheep of His pasture. What we wear, what we say, how long and elaborate our prayers are, how much we talk about our humility or how much money we donate, that's not how it works. We are to pray in private, give in secret, let God see our hearts and not boast about it. Our personality, knowledge, gifts, resources, these are all from God, so that we can boast in Him, our beautiful Father in Heaven.

QQQQQQuestions:

-In what areas do you strive to excel? In what ways can you seek to bring glory to God instead of yourself?

Everything. I am an success-driven person. Not necessarily in a "get to the top" kind of way, more that I hate failing, because I hate disappointing people, and I hate not being good enough. It's a problem I'm slowly working through, slowly being a key word there. But some of the biggest areas of striving to excel would be: school, art, and in my walk with Jesus. None of those are necessarily bad things, until they become ultimate things, until I'm so focused on not failing and doing a good job and that becomes the point, instead of simply doing my best, letting Jesus do the rest, and bringing glory to His beautiful name through my actions. I can get so caught up in wanting people to see me as being good enough, and that's what I focus on, so succeeding becomes an idol, failure my greatest fear, and at that point God has been so removed from the picture and I can find myself, yet again, on the me-centered throne of Katydom.

-Jesus brought religious pride into the spotlight as an example of what not to do. Why do you think that is?

The pharisees were the religious gurus of the time. They were the pastors, deacons, youth-group elders, whatever, they were the ones people looked up to as religious and wise. Everyone knew who they were, and everyone could see their pride when it was compared to the humility of others. Jesus knew people would be able to identify with that example, many people had probably had their fair share of feeling "not good enough" compared to the oh-so-holy pharisees of the time.

-How do you struggle with humility before God and others? Why should your attitude before God be a humble one?

Honestly I get to a point of pride with my faith far too often. I feel like I'm doing "so good" with Jesus and having just such a great relationship, living such a great life for Him, and then I realize that and start thinking about it and how great I am doing and it stops being about how awesome Jesus is and about how great I am. I want people to be impressed by me and my walk with Jesus, I want my prayers to be so heartfelt and full of joy in Jesus, I people to see that I have a loving heart, a passionate spirit, that I"m just so focused on God, but too often for my own glory rather than His. It's so, so easy to get caught up in that trap, to make my relationship with Jesus about how good I look instead of how awesome He is. And He is beyond awesome! My attitude should be utter humility because Jesus is so perfect and I am so perfectly flawed. He is so good and I am so drenched in sin and unrighteousness. I am so unworthy, yet still He loves me, yet still He sacrificed His life for me, yet still His blood poured out to wash away my dark stains of sin and shame. That is why I should be humbled before Him, because I do not deserve to be anywhere near Him, yet He welcomes me into His arms and calls me "friend," "daughter," and "beloved."

-How does Jesus model humility before God and others? How has His life influenced your desire to do the same?

Throughout Jesus' time on earth He was constantly giving all the glory to His Heavenly Father. Jesus gave God credit for His words, miracles, thoughts, and actions. Everything was the will of the Father. Jesus didn't take the credit. And Jesus was so servant-hearted. Here was God in the form of man on earth, the King of the universe! And He was serving, washing feet, healing the blind, preaching until His tongue was dry and His head heavy with exhaustion, yet He never stopped serving. It's like the song Humble King

"Cuz You are the God of the broken
The friend of the weak
You wash the feet of the weary
Embrace the ones in need
And I want to be like you Jesus
To have this heart in me
You are the God of the humble
You are the humble King"

I want to be humble, rid of my sin of pride, wholly focused and centered on living and loving for Jesus - no thought or care or worry of my own. 

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