Freakin Lent

So Lent is starting to really bother me. I may rant a little here, but don't worry, it's a decently well thought out rant. So everyone's been talking about it a lot at the various church/Jesus-related things I go to. We talked about it at me and Katherine's small group on Thursday, at small group this morning, and at YoungLife this evening. Every time it's a similar theme.

People discuss how shallow so many people make it, how instead of giving up something legitimate, with the purpose of stretching, strengthening, and furthering their relationship with God, they make it about getting healthier, losing weight, or breaking a bad habit.

Now I'm not saying I disagree. Not at all. In fact, I would venture to say I agree. Lent has tradition and meaning and shouldn't be taken lightly. Here's where I take offense.

Consistently every time this has been discussed, people have used the example of giving up sweets. At this point in time, Katherine and I give one another a short, slightly hesitant glance, as we have both committed to depriving ourselves of all desserts, candies, and various other sweets for the 40 days of Lent.

Our quick eye-locking is often noticed, and commented upon. An awkward, abrupt conversation ensues in which we are asked if that's what we're giving up and we reply, "yes." But we feel judged, so judged, for our decision. Without pausing to understand why the two of us have chosen to give up sweets, it is assumed we have no legitimate understanding of the tradition, that our Lent sacrifice is purely superficial and shallow, and that we haven't thought deeply or spiritually about what we are giving up.

However, these sweeping and seemingly judgmental (I don't want to make assumptions) reactions to our Lent "fast" are entirely false. Though it is true that many give up sweets for Lent with the intention of only bettering themselves, rather than their relationship with God, this is not the case for Katherine and me. Let me tell you why I am giving up sweets, and Katherine's reasons are similar to my own.

I used to almost never eat desserts or candy. I have slowly re-introduced these things into my diet, particularly increasing my intake of chocolate. I have noticed that after a particularly long or difficult day, I just want a nice big cup of hot chocolate or a chocolate bar (or Candy Corn, gotta love that stuff, as disgustingly pure corn-syrupy as it is). I've become dependent on them. Rather than going to tell Jesus about my difficult day, listening to a calming or worshipful song, or journaling my thoughts, I just want some chocolate to make it all better.

Now this might be a bit of an over-exaggeration. I don't eat bags upon bags of chocolate or other candy weekly, or crave it constantly. But on a small level, chocolate is comforting, tasty, and generally makes me happy. Realistically, I should be thinking, "I can't wait to get back to my dorm and have a quiet time with Jesus," rather than, "I can't wait to have some chocolate. That'll make me feel better."

So there's one reason that I want to give it up. Sugar, especially chocolate, which contains caffeine, is addictive, and I want to be addicted to Jesus and love, nothing else.

Here's the other thing. And yes, this has to do with self-image and being healthy, but hear me out. The more I allow myself to eat unhealthy things, the more I want them, because junk food is addicting, and the worse I feel. Feeling bad about myself both in my health and how I feel about my physical appearance can be detrimental. If I feel poorly about myself, I focus even more on myself and how negatively I view myself. This means I'm not respecting or taking care of the person He has made. I'm hating what He loves, and that isn't right. It also means that rather than thinking about God and others, I'm focusing on myself. Choosing to give up desserts and candy will make me healthier, but this goal is not just for me, but for God as well. My focus should be on Him, not worrying about whether I look good enough in a swimming suit or not.

My other Lent goal is not sacrificial, but rather additive. My desire is to push myself even more in my relationship with Christ and jumpstart a new tradition of thanking Him daily. His word says to give thanks in all things, and I often fail miserably in that regard. I want to focus on Him even more by giving Him the thanks He deserves for all the wonderful things I have been given, and for the seemingly bad things that I don't yet understand.

Some people's decisions about Lent may be shallow, but don't automatically make that assumption. You don't know a person's heart, so stop judging a book by its title or cover, and give it at least enough of a chance to read the summary in the front flap. You never know why a person has made or not made a decision, why they look a certain way, why they speak with a lisp, why they do or don't do something. Don't make assumptions without asking questions. And whether a person has given up something for Lent out of a true desire to grow spiritually or a more personal-betterment reason, it is still a great way to start a conversation. You can talk to someone about why it is important to them, what lead them to give that up. Go deep, ask questions, forge relationships, and stop making shallow assumptions about a person or their decisions based upon a few words or a quick sideways glance.