Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Power, Prayer, and Butterfly Wings

Prayer is great. It's our direct line of communication with God. I mean we have the Bible to read, a letter of sorts from God, but prayer is just us talking straight to Him, and sometimes Him speaking directly back to us. 

A few Sundays ago at the church I've been pseudo attending (the Journey in Tower Groves), the pastor talked a bit about prayer, specifically how the prayers of a believer are powerful. Now I've heard that before, and nearly dismissed it as common knowledge I need not heed, but it stuck with me. James 5:16 talks about the great strength of prayer, saying, "therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective."
 
I don't feel like my prayer is especially powerful, effective, strong, or great. Yet I hear so many stories of the power of prayer. Sick, wounded, or broken people are prayed over and made whole, healed. Money comes in at just the right moment, miracles are performed. James 5:17-18 says that, "Elijah was a human being, even as we are. He prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and it did not rain on the land for three and a half years. Again he prayed, and the heavens gave rain, and the earth produced its crops." 

My prayer does not create rain, stop rain, or produce crops. I pray all the time, though. I talk to God throughout the day, He is a constant companion who I inform of probably way too many of my thoughts. But I don't see the power of prayer played out in my life, I don't see these miraculous results. 





About a month ago I was telling my mom about one of my atheist friends. Her response was, "well have you been praying for them?" And I suddenly realized that no, no I had not. In fact, I had not been praying really for anyone. And I realized that the vast majority of the time, though I pray a lot, I usually pray about myself. I pray about the things I want to change in my life, pray for strength, guidance, humility, joy, to not bite my siblings heads off every time they annoy me...the usual. But I wasn't praying for others. I wasn't beseeching God to save the lives of my lost friends and family. I wasn't lifting them up and placing them in His loving hands. I wasn't praying for the widow and orphan, I wasn't praying for anyone but myself. 
 
Thwarted, yet again. Everytime I pridefully start to think I've lost some pride, it rears back up to remind me that I naturally make myself the center of my universe. Daily, daily, I must lose myself and put God on the throne. Each day I have to eject myself from that seat and put Him back up there. 

I would never deign to call myself a "righteous man." I aspire to one day be somewhat close to slightly righteous, but I am too sinful to make such a classification of myself. But I will pray, and not just for myself. But I'm still selfish, self-centered, and screwed-up. So I forget a lot. And though I begin my prayers with great hopes of praying for everyone I've ever known and begging for the healing of all the hurt and sick I am acquainted with...I usually end up just talking to God about me, me, me for lengthy periods of time. So, I'm making a prayer book, like Aibileen does in the book The Help. So if you have people, places, or things you would like added to this list, go right ahead and tell me, and I will begin to pray.

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